Just when I think that I'm feeling like a scholar (and an erudite one at that), I get these moments when I panic that everyone will see right through me for the sham that I am. I know these feelings are normal, given my status as scholar-in-training, but they aren't any more pleasant as a result.
I just sent off what I hope will be the final draft of my dissertation prospectus today. Yes, I know it should've been completed ages ago. The first draft was. I actually wrote the first draft over a year ago. But since then I've waited a long time while each person looked at it and then responded. So it's taken forever.
I'm really hoping it meets with approval and I can get to what I really want, writing the dissertation itself.
But before then, I've been asked to submit a chapter for an edited collection on Octavia Butler. It's exciting, but also very scary, because I want it to be great. But I've only got two months to get it done, and if I want my advisor to look at it and respond, I've got much less than two months.
So the pressure's on. Look good. Do it in only a few weeks. Yikes!
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