Minor adjustments

During the last few weeks, oldest daughter has been cleaning up her room. She's organizing her possessions under the overall category of 'what will I take with me to college?' (which strikes me as a bit early to worry about, but what the heck, at least she's cleaning up)

I get that she's planning to go to university next year, and I'm doing whatever she needs me to do to get her there, but it hasn't quite sunk in yet. I get that she's moving on to the next step in her life, becoming even more independent (it's highly unlikely given the schools she's looking at that she'll live at home) and starting to figure out what she wants her life to look like.

She'll be responsible for choosing her own meals, she'll need to get along with roomates instead of sisters, she'll be responsible for keeping a larger part of her living space clean, she'll have to make her own decisions about watching tv or doing homework without someone to remind her that homework's more important (yes, I'm baffled by it, but sometimes I still have to remind her), she won't be answerable to anyone for where she goes, how long she goes there or who she hangs out with, she'll need to figure out how to get around (possibly a new city) and how long it will take, she'll need to budget her money for things more important than just CDs and clothes, and the list goes on.

She'll do it. She'll make mistakes. She'll blow the grocery money on something trivial and eat Ramen noodles for a week. But she'll manage. I just have to keep telling myself that. She'll manage. We all did this at one time in one form or another. She's probably better prepared to care for herself than I was at the same age. Very soon it will be an awfully exciting/scary time for her.

The thing I don't think I've wrapped my head around is the idea that our family will look a little different next year. Of course she's always part of us, but if she's not living with us on a daily basis, then the day to day family interactions are going to look much different than they do now. Her mail won't come here anymore, I won't make dinner for 5 every day, each remaining sister only has one other person to yell at (yes, they get into three way 'arguments'), the chores list will need to change with fewer people here doing chores, I won't be able to talk to her everyday, I'll know less about what's up in her life. We've talked about how her life will change, but I haven't thought much about how our lives will change - those of us left behind. It's not empty-nest - there's two more at home who'll be here for a while, but it will require an adjustment that I just haven't thought out yet.

Maybe I'll wait to think it all through after we know where she'll be going (and where we're going to be as well!) Right now, I'm just going to enjoy the time we do have.